I'll Be Seeing You...

Why I Hate Valentine's Day

Ok, we are all hearing it everywhere we go!  Valentine's, Valentine's.  What I'm getting, what I want, how wonderful my spouse is, look at what he bought for me.  Ok, hate is a very strong word.  But it's one of the hardest days of the year, Valentine's Day just makes me sad.

I get it.  You love your spouse.  You are so happy he remembers to give you something, and on this one day of the year especially.  But you see, my spouse has been gone for four Valentine Day's now. And it never gets any easier.  It's a day I truly wish I could curl up in bed and just hide from the world.  And even the week before.  I hear it everywhere I go.  I see it constantly on Facebook, or Twitter, or even television.  It's....difficult.

So what can you do?  If you have a friend who has lost their spouse, here are a few suggestions.

• You can call them beforehand and just ask them how they are doing, if they need to talk, if they want company.
• You can send them a card, but for heaven's sake, do not send a Valentine card.
• You can take them out to dinner, a few days beforehand, please, that specific day is one no widow wants to be out.
• You don't have to hide your gifts or happiness from us, but please don't flaunt them, it just reminds us that we will never get another one from our spouse.
• You can continue to be happy with your spouse, because we truly want that for you and are very happy that you can experience that, because we can't.

Mourning never truly ends for us.  It is an ongoing journey.  And we live with it daily.  Valentine's Day is just a reminder of how hard that journey has been and will continue to be.

So, I don't truly hate Valentine's Day, but it does make me very sad and it is a day I can do without. A day I would like to forget.  One that has no notation on my calendar.

Until next time.

Gratitude Journal

You might ask, what in the world is a Gratitude Journal?  Is that some kind of new age thing?  Actually they have been around a lot longer than the last 10 years. Many people write in a Journal daily, or they used to be called diaries.  I keep a Gratitude Journal.

A Gratitude Journal can be as simple, or as fancy as you like.  The composition notebooks you can find at Walmart, or Target, or even the dollar stores, work just fine, or you can use a Gratitude Journal that is pre-made, like the one I show here "The Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude" by Sarah Ban Breathnach, which you can find online.  Or you can use what I use, which is a moleskin notebook, or just a plain journal.

The important thing isn't what you use, it's what you use it for.  Here are three tips which have helped me.

1.  Every night, list 3 - 5 things you have been thankful or grateful for during the day.

2.  List them in a complete sentence, explaining who, what, where, why and how.  The more       explanation you can use, the more you can generate the feelings that go along with them.

3.  Take 3 - 5 minutes for each one and allow yourself to really feel the gratitude of having or experiencing each one of your sentences.

Scripture has been teaching the value of thankfulness for centuries.

1 Thessalonians 5:18  "In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

Studies have been done on the theory that gratefulness, or thankfulness is actually good for our well-being.

"The experience of gratitude, and the actions stimulated by it, build and strengthen social bonds and friendships. Moreover, encouraging people to focus on the benefits they have received from others leads them to feel loved and cared for by others (Reynolds, 1983). Therefore, gratitude appears to build friendships and other social bonds. "  (Counting Blessings Versus Burdens: An Experimental Investigation of Gratitude and Subjective Well-Being in Daily Life, Robert A. Emmons, Michael E. McCullough, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2003)

The 3 major things I have found from this practice are:

1.  I sleep better after having done this every evening.  

2.  I have more of a feeling of well-being.  I just feel better.

3.  Things come easier, my daily chores aren't quite as much of a burden, I seem to be able to solve problems in a faster and more logical fashion.

Gratitude Journaling may help you out!

So try starting your own Gratitude Journal today and see what happens in the next few weeks.  It won't hurt you any, and it may just help you immensely.

Until next time.

Ash Wednesday

Ash Wednesday is the first day of the Lenten Season.  A season meant to be used for personal introspection and discernment.  A day when we hear the words of the priest when we receive the ashes on our forehead, in the shape of a cross, "O man, remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return."

Lent is a season of repentance and the ashes we receive on our forehead on Ash Wednesday, signify our death, and repentance for our sins.

The word Lent comes from the Anglo-Saxon word Lencten, which means "spring".

You might hear someone say they are giving up chocolate for Lent, or Facebook, or Coffee, Tea, or Coca-Cola.  Those seem to be very popular.  The truth is, the 'giving up' is meant as a form of discipline, and although it's good to use it as a form of penance and discipline, it's also very important to actually add something during Lent.  More prayer time, reading a book that would be spiritually enlightening, daily Mass.

Fasting and Abstinence during Lent are practices which have been in place for hundreds of years. Fasting is a limitation of the amount of food one takes in during the day.  Abstinence denotes giving up a certain food for a specific time period.  Catholics have days of fasting and abstinence on Ash Wednesday, every Friday of Lent, and Good Friday.  So on those days, we limit our food to one main meal, the other two meals to be substantially smaller, or both combined, not to equal a full meal.  On those days, we also abstain from red meat, or anything that may contain meat by-products.  Many people only take bread and water on those days. The fasting and abstinence isn't applied to those who are elderly (the Church uses the age of 60, however, this is voluntary), may have a serious illness, or to children under the age of 14.

Until next time.

4 Natural Aids for Coughs

We've all had it.  That nagging cough that goes along with a cold or flu.  Here are four natural aids I have used in the past to help with a cough that won't go away.

Just for the record, I am not a doctor, nor a medical practitioner, and this is not medical advice.  It is always best to check with your doctor before using any type of help, especially if you have a medical condition.

1.  Peppermint candy, lemon juice and honey.

Melt the peppermint candy in some warm water, add lemon juice and honey to taste.  The peppermint can sooth a sore throat, and the lemon helps to cut phlegm.

2.  Horehound candy.

Horehound is an herb that is indigenous to Britian. Horehound acts as an expectorant.  Some people don't like the taste, but I've been using it since I was a child and it always helps me.

3.  Lemon juice. Cayenne and honey. 

Just a pinch of cayenne.  The cayenne helps to sooth the throat, although if you use too much it is going to burn, so just a pinch does the trick.  It can also help to clear nasal passages. The honey helps to coat the throat, lemon juice cuts phlegm and has Vitamin C.  I've used this as an adult, the cayenne does sting, especially if you have a sore throat to begin with, so I would not ever use this on my grandchildren.

4.  Lemon juice and honey. 

Just these two ingredients help to sooth a cough.  They have been used together for many centuries.  I use a tsp. every three to four hours.  

These are my four favorite old fashioned aids for a cough.  I'm sure there are many others out there, that our grandmothers and mothers used for us.  As I said before, please do not use any of these without checking with your doctor first.  

Until next time.

St. Valentine's Day

Ever wonder why we call February 14th Valentine's day?  I never knew the reason until just the last 10 years or so.  I just thought it was like other holidays, got it's name somewhere in the distant past.  I never thought about why it was named Valentine's Day!

There were actually three Valentine's in the Catholic Church in the third and fourth century.  It is widely held that St. Valentine was a priest that lived in the Roman Empire during the reign of the Emperor Claudius II in the third century A.D.  During that time, it was illegal in the Roman Empire for couples to marry in the Church.

St. Valentine's married couples in secret, without the permission of the Emperor of Rome.  For this he was jailed.  While he was in jailed, it is said, he found favor with the Emperor, and attempted to convert him to Christianity.  This angered the Emperor and he ordered Valentine condemned to death.  He was executed outside the Flaminian Gate in Rome on February 14th, 269 A.D.

His feast day was first established by Pope Gelasius I in 496 A.D.

It wasn't until Chaucer wrote "Parliament of Foules" in 1381 that St. Valentine was associated with a day for lovers.

Since then, it has evolved into a day that celebrates love.

May you have a St. Valentine's Day full of love, and remembrance for a saintly priest who gave his life for the Christian faith.

Until next time.

Faith, Grief and Love, part Three

Love

This time, I just wanted to share some ideas I have about love.  Especially love in the context of grief and faith.  It is, I think, essential for everyday life.  Not that everyone has to have a significant other, but that everyone requires love, given and received from family or friends, or husband or wife, or significant other.

• Eternal

Yes, it is.  As scientists find out more and more about this quantum field we live in, they are spreading the word that love is eternal.  Everything is sent out into the quantum field, including your very thoughts, as energy.  And there it lives for eternity.  My love for Tom and his love for me will never die.  It will outlast us.  It’s a very comforting thought.

• Emotional  

Ok, another loaded word!   Love is so unpredictable.  There one day, seemingly gone the next.  Many women who have been in an abusive relationship, or just a bad relationship, may not feel grief (which I believe is part of love),  the same as women who were deeply in love with their husbands.  But I believe that even in those situations, there is a connection.  They have come into our lives and changed us, for the bad, or for the good.  Does the soul connect in a realm we cannot see?  Perhaps, even then, our souls recognize the image of God in the other.

• Enveloping

Especially in the case of those who were deeply in love with their spouses, or had a great relationship with their parents, or their children.  That love is totally enveloping.  It enfolds us, wraps us up in emotions so great, that sometimes they overwhelm our faith.  And sometimes they only enrich our faith.  But no one can deny the enveloping nature of Love.

So these are a few of the things I have come to realize through my journey of Faith, Grief and Love.  It takes some time, but we finally work through some of the grief.  

I see clearly now that God was giving me time.  And like most of us, I wanted to rush through all that and win that race I like to call “I Have Survived All of This and My Life is Back to Normal!”

I tell you all this to make a point that might help you through the same thing.  With grief, you have to plow right through the middle of it.

Don't cover it up.

Don't deny it.

If you need to cry, cry.

If you need to yell, yell.

If you need to talk to someone, call someone who loves you and will listen without judging.

There is only one way to get through that tunnel, and that is to walk through.  You will feel so much better when you come out into the daylight on the other side.

So to answer the question, in the first part of these three, "Do I believe there is a God?"  Yes, I do.    He's big enough to handle our questions and doubt.  And he gives us wonderful answers about faith, grief and love.

Until next time.

Faith, Grief and Love, Part Two

Grief

So, yesterday I shared a few of the realizations I had been given on Faith, especially in relation to Grief and Love.   Today, I'd like to share a few I've been given on Grief.  Most of us try to avoid talking about grief.  Life is easier that way.

Grief is something every human will experience at one point in our lives, unless that life is cut short at a very young age.  Many books have been written about it.  Many songs have been penned.  It's full of angst and heartache and is still necessary for the human experience.  It's the one thing we do not like to talk about.  For those who haven't been touched by grief, I hope you can take something away from this to help you in a future time.  For those who have experienced it, I hope you can see this and realize that you are not alone.

• Time

All of us have heard that old adage that time heals all wounds.  My father was the first person in my life who told me this.  I don't believe that's true now.  I believe that time gives us the essential ingredient to learn to live with grief instead of 'getting over' grief.  It's something you never get over.  But like a physical scrape, it scars over, and we are able to carry on, although forever changed.

• Tenacity

Yes, we have to be very tenacious.  We have to have that stick to it-ness in us.  Many just do not.  My father-in-law did not have it.  He was a great guy, but when my mother-in -law died, he buried himself in a bottle and waited.  Basically, he waited to die so he could be with her.  Some of us are given more strength.  And we go on, even if we dont' want to.  And believe me there have been times, when I've thought maybe I didn't want to either.  But here I sit, typing away on my computer.

• Transformational

Yes, it is.  It changes everything about us.  Our entire lives are turned upside down.  Our purpose is forever changed.  Our future is gone, we have to rebuild a completely new future without our loved one.  Transformational?  Oh yes.  Sharing these experiences is something I would not have ever though I could do ten years ago.  But my grief made me a different creature.  I hope I can help one person navigate these lonely roads.

Those are my three for today.  They gave me many hours of structured thought while I was dealing with my grief.  They did help me on my journey, whether or not I was in the middle, or even at the beginning of grief, they helped me realize I was not alone.  Faith always comes first, but grief has given me many tools now to use to go forward in my life. 

Love is always there, in the background, sometimes it comes forward to play a starring role, sometimes just a supporting actress.  But it's there nonetheless and tomorrow I share my three top things I have learned about love, while in the midst of grief.

Until next time.

Faith, Grief and Love

Are you experiencing grief from the loss of a loved one? Do you feel like your faith is gone?  Does God, in fact, love us?  I had to ask myself, “Do I still believe there is a God?” many times in the weeks and months following the deaths of my father-in-law, my mother and my husband, Tom, all in one short year.

I’ve broken down some of the answers I was given in those hard times, to three main themes.  Faith, Grief, and Love.  First some background.

My father in law had been struggling with alcohol, but his death was sudden and completely unexpected, leaving us with a lot of questions.  My mother and husband both had long illnesses, leading to their deaths.  A week after my husband's death, I was in a doctor's office with my only sibling, getting the news that he had stage four cancer.

My faith was struggling.. Heck I was struggling.

All the hundreds of prayers for healing had gone unanswered, it seemed.  I know now that they were answered, just not in the way I wanted them to be.  But at the time, it felt like a deafening silence from heaven.

Like no one was home. 

I prayed written prayers.  I prayed spontaneous prayers.  I prayed the Scriptures.  I prayed pleading prayers, and I tried, really tried, to believe in miracles.  And I felt no comfort, no answers, no response.  I wanted that miracle for my Mom and especially for Tom, and it wasn't forthcoming. But as time slipped by, I was given a serious of what I call those “Ah, ha!” moments. 

Faith 

Faith is a very fragile thing.  It has to be continually fed, through prayer, Scripture, and Will.  

• Persevere

The Bible is full of stories of women and men who persevered through hard times.  And although we like to think we could do the same, we seem changed fundamentally by the times we are in.   We have the never-ending theme of the 80’s “just do what feels good” playing in the background constantly. 

• Prayer 

Without prayer, perseverance cannot be sustained and therefore, neither can faith.  Prayer is essential to the life of a believer today.  It’s time away from the madness of the crowd.  Time to ask for answers to life’s problems. Time to share with a higher being who loves us.

• Purpose  

Ok, I know there are widows now saying, “hold on just a minute”!   Yes, sometimes when we are enmeshed in grief, purpose is the last thing we can find.  I know for months after I lost my husband, I asked myself hundreds of times, what exactly am I supposed to be doing now?  For as long as I could remember, my goals were simple.  I wanted to be a Mom.  I wanted to be a Wife.  Now my children were grown, and my husband had died.  Exactly WHAT was I supposed to be doing with my life?  But I’m asking you to keep looking.  Keep asking, and persevere in faith.  Your purpose will come to you.  It may take days, or weeks, or even years.  But like the sun rising in the East, it will happen.

In the next few days I will be posting the three main themes I have found with Grief and Love as well.  Stay tuned!

Until next time.

Home from Thanksgiving

I have been absent for more than a couple of weeks.  I went to my daughter's house for Thanksgiving.  It was wonderful, I got two weeks of time to spend with her in the evening after she got home from work and two weeks to spend with her four children.  Her husband works shift work, so I really didn't get to talk to him much, when he's not working (12 hour shifts), he is usually sleeping.

My daughter worked hard to make a gluten free Thanksgiving meal for me, and it was the best Thanksgiving meal I've eaten since becoming gluten free.  In the past, I just ate what I could, and sometimes eating things I shouldn't .  But this year I had an entire meal and it felt wonderful.

Now to get back to this blog and attempt to be more regular in my posts.

Today, I'm working on dehydrating a #10 can of peaches.  I love the way they keep in a small jar, taking up less room and they are great to just snack on.  They will last a few months.  The next project?  Dehydrating a large bag of shredded potatoes.  I have been out now for a few months and it's much more economical to do them myself.

Also, I am working on my children's scrapbooks and I really need to get some pages done.

Until next time.

Procrastination, or just a busy life?

The Write 31 Challenge

The Write 31 Challenge is over.  And although I spent quite a bit of time writing, I didn't get them all on my blog.  So I have read a lot of legitimate excuses for why others didn't get it all done, or why they didn't have time.  So do I have a legit excuse?

I mean, we all procrastinate, right?  I know I do, do you too?  Ok, I did have time with my grandkids, and a big hometown weekend (we have a huge celebration once a year here in town), with my Wyoming kids and grandkids home, and getting ready for that, and spending time with my kids and grandkids here, as well as doctor's appointments.  So do you think that's a good excuse?

Probably not.  As I said, I did have writing done.  I carry a small notebook with me, and I was writing furiously in that, idea after idea after idea, on what to put on the blog.  They all sounded great.  But the problem was they never made it into print.  Why is that I wonder?

Ok, let me just admit it.  I am a procrastinator!!!  Wow.  I don't feel any better after that admission.  But I know what to do about it.  I've read and read about this problem for years now.  Why, oh WHY do I still have such a problem with it?

I see other bloggers who write and some who write daily, and I wonder, HOW in the world do they do that?  And what's wrong with me?

So, my goal for this month (yes, I'm putting it in writing AGAIN), is to at least blog three times a week...and I'm already a week in and this is the first, now THAT strikes me as ironic!

Cross your fingers for me, ok?

Until next time.

Books I'm Reading - Day 7 of Write 31 Days

Book lists fascinate me.  I love to see what others are reading and find books I might want for my own lists.  I think you can tell alot about a person by what they read.  I regularly have four or five books going at all times.  I can't begin to list all of the one's I have read, some I have loved and read over and over, and some I forgot the minute I put them down.

So I thought I'd share what is on my nightstand (which is where I do all of my reading, before sleep).  I'm not sure how to get these to link anywhere yet, so I'm just going to list them.  Maybe one day I'll be good enough at this blogging experiment to be able to help you find them online.

Blog, Inc., by Joy Deangdeelert Cho

I'm about 10 pages in on this one and am really enjoying the conversations with other bloggers.  It is packed with information and how-to, as well as interesting biography.

For Writer's Only, by Sophie Burnham

I've read through this before, but this time I am taking a page at a time and really contemplating the blurbs about writing.  Great book to read if you want to take time to think about the writing process.

The Mammoth Hunters, by Jean M. Auel

I loved this series the moment I read the first chapter in the first book.  I am a history nut and ancient history is the best, as far as I'm concerned.  The story of Ayla, and her entire life is laid out and fascinating in it's scope.  This is a re-read, as I have the entire series and will keep it for life.

American Grit: A Woman's Letters From the Ohio Frontier, edited by Emily Foster.

Am over halfway done on this.  I have this one on my Kindle so I can take it with me.  So much history of how people lived and survived in the early United States. Will be keeping this one on my Kindle.


Plunder and Deceit, by Mark R. Levin

I have just started this book and so far it has given me food for thought.  I am very interested in politics and social studies in America, so this book is interesting.  Will let you know later what I thought of it.

What books are you reading right now?  Let me know as I might want to check some of them out.

Until next time.

Learning to Fix a Drip on the Faucet

"First you want to look carefully at the cartridge to see if there are any notches or anything to tell you which way it goes so you put it back in the right place."  Uh...yeah!  That's what I thought too when I watched the You-Tube video on how to fix a dripping faucet.  Then I sucked it up and got on with it.

The faucet had leaked since before Tom died.  It was just one of those things he put off until he had some time to get to it, and other things came first.  So, after he was gone, I stood in that bathroom one day and thought, "I wonder how much that is costing me in water?"  Funny how often those types of thoughts go through my head now that I'm on one fixed income.

So, I set my mind to fixing that darned leaky faucet - it was either me, or it - my house wasn't big enough for the both of us!

1. First I had to find the tools.  

That was an adventure all in itself.  If you had ever seen my husband's garage you would know immediately the scope of the problem.  After searching for a day (you think I'm exaggerating, but I'm not), I found what I needed (it was at that point, I decided I HAD to organize - which will show up in another post later).

2.  I had to get supplies.

I then went to the hardware store and found the parts to replace those on my faucet all by myself.  On my way out of the store I'm sure there were people wondering about that crazy lady patting herself (literally) on the back!

3.  I had to do the work.

I got home, turned off the water under the sink and started disassembling.  It was much easier than I thought.  I put everything back together, turned the water on and VIOLA!!!!  My very own indoor fountain!  Four foot high and as pretty as any you find in a well manicured French country garden!

After thirty minutes of getting the water turned off, cleaning and mopping up, I tried to fix that faucet again.  I read the instructions thoroughly this time before I touched it, and found where I had made a mistake.  I was sure this time I could fix it.

I even went to the computer and watched those You-Tube videos again.  Back I went to the sink to tame this monster!  When I got everything put together and turned the water on, I found to my elation that I not only didn't have a fountain, but the hot water turned off and on, and more importantly, NO DRIP!

Hallelujah!

I was on my way to being a full fledged independent Grandma!

Next time your faucet drips, make sure you gather your tools, get supplies and follow the instructions.

Until next time.

Does everyone's family magically multiply?

Does everyone have a family that magically multiplies?  When I was a young woman, I thought I would love a large family.  My mom was one of nine and my dad was one of six.  But I only had one brother, and no sisters.  I always thought four would be the ideal number of children.  The good Lord had other plans and four just wasn't part of it.

I would like to say they never gave me a minute's worry, but I don't like to lie!  Yes, they were typical kids and teenagers.  We had our share of scraped knees (baseball and softball), scraped knuckles (Tae Kwon Do), Concussions (baseball again)!  And one hyper-extended knee (softball).  And they had their typical teenage moments.  You know, getting stuck at the river in Dad's four wheel drive, or better yet, using Dad's four wheel drive to pull everybody else out... Prom...getting pulled over for racing on Main street (yes, it was and still is a small town).


But I would have liked more than two.  I have laughingly said over the years that the good Lord looked down and said "This woman has enough with the two that she has!"  But truly, they were good kids, never in jail, didn't get into drugs or anything like that.  Just typical teenagers, who grew up while I was busy trying to live our life.

They both went on to marry their own loves and have given me eight grandchildren.  Each of my children have four children of their own, which I find downright ironic.  But I won't complain because they are my life.

Ages 12 (13 next month, our first teen), 11, 9, 8, 6, 6, 3 and 2.  Little stair steps.  They are a joy, and a worry, as all children are.  Two have an incurable disease, one juvenile Type 1 Diabetes and one Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis.  But even with those, they are all pretty normal children.

The entire family, grandparents included, have all gone to watch baseball, softball, soccer, dance, choir and now band.  Four live in my hometown, four live 12 hours away from me.  I see the one's who live close three or four times a week, including Church.  The children who live far, either come home, or I go to them once every couple of months for a week or two at a time.  We also do Facetime and Skype now.

Eight beautiful beings the Lord brought into my life to fill it up with smiles and tears and frowns and those four little words I live for...

"I love you, Grandma."

Until next time.

Never enough time.

Time keeps slipping through my grasp.  I remember well those hectic mornings of hitting the snooze alarm just until that last second, attempting to rob every precious second of sleep from the day.  Then the groggy moments of waking up while simultaneously waking everyone else.

Coffee next...always!  And the real rush started - breakfast, dressing, getting the kids ready.  Did you forget your homework?  Do you have your notebook?  Did you remember your after school appointment?

Then the rush out the door.  The inevitable "Mom, I forgot..." on the way to the car.  Dropping off, managing traffic, sometimes with breakfast, most times without.  Busy days at work.  Donuts (or whatever was in the break room) at my desk.  Lunchtime was always a mix of trying to eat healthy (I know!!!  after donuts??),  and errands or personal stuff to get done, like bills.  Back to work - pick up kids - home - start supper!  Tom home at 4:30 like clockwork.  Chores in between it all, and supper and extra curricular activities.  More chores (usually laundry) after supper while everyone else was watching tv.  Then baths or showers, then bedtime, and I can breathe.  For a few seconds at least.  A few minutes of time for me before I fall into bed, exhausted.  In those moments, I remember thinking, "Someday I will be retired.  I will be home all the time.  I will have time to myself.  I will get things done.  I will SLEEP!"

That was then, this is now.

Alarm goes off, hit the alarm, although nowadays, I find it almost impossible to grab those 10 minute naps between the snooze alarm, so I just get up anyway. I don't sleep as well, sometimes 6, sometimes 7, sometimes 3 hours of sleep.  Get up, start coffee, get dressed.  I get 30 minutes of wake up time now, and prayer time.  And I'm off!  My days today aren't as hectic, but they are still as busy.  The kids are grown with families of their own, but I have grands and help out by staying with them, although it's to my benefit too because I love the time with them.  When it's time to go home, I go home now by myself.  Tom has been gone three years this month.  No 4:30 pm home time, no asking "How did your day go?"  When I get home, I still have to do dishes, do laundry, dump the trash, run the sweeper, keep the house, mow the lawn, weed eat the yard, keep the garden, sweep the driveway, vacuum the house, fix supper, pay the bills.  All of it now is my responsibility.

And in those few minutes right before I go to sleep when I can breathe, I think "Someday when the grandkids grow up, I'll have time, I will sleep.  But I will be alone."

31 Days - Day Two

Ah, the joys of being a Grandma....until those days when you haven't slept but 4 hours.  Don't you hate not sleeping?  Tossing and turning until the clock says 12:30 am, 2:00, 3:30, and then finally 4:00?

What in the world has happened to my sleep patterns?  When I was a young woman, very young, I could go to sleep at nine or ten at night and sleep straight through twelve hours of time.  Oh, for those days!  Now I'm lucky if I get seven hours, that constitutes an entire night for me now.  Granted, I am a night owl.  Seldom do I sleep before 1:00 am.  But then I can sleep until 7:30 or 8:00 easily.  I used to think I would never be one of those people who can't sleep, or don't require as much sleep.  But here I am.

So, what does that have to do with being a Grandma you might ask?  Well, for one thing, this phenomenon seems to happen as we get older.  And from what I have been able to ascertain, scientists aren't quite sure why we need less sleep as we age.  And those years are creeping up on me.  Granted, I'm not sixty yet (only one year to go), but as the old saying goes, sometimes I feel much older.  Also, my grandchildren know when I'm tired.  Grandma gets 'grumpy' sometimes.  Yes, they can tell, as much as I try to stay joyful around them.  It might be that I'm just quieter, or I don't smile as much, or I'm not as physically active.

What is the solution?  I've come across a few.  Chamomile tea helps a little to get me to sleep.  A good foot soak with magnesium salts does a lot of good, or a bath is better.  The magnesium helps you calm and get to sleep and continues in your bloodstream to help you stay asleep.  It seems the pores in your feet are larger than most of the rest of your body, so the magnesium can be absorbed by the body easier. Also, computer use late at night, will ensure I'm up for hours longer.  So, cutting off the screen about nine, no playing on the IPhone, and turning the tv off helps.  I do read on my Kindle.  I don't have a white screen, but a grey screen and it doesn't seem to bother me as much.  Last but not least, is prayer.  I can start praying and usually fall asleep praying.  I heard years ago that if you fall asleep praying, your guardian angel finishes your prayers for you.  That's a comforting thought.  But something about praying helps calm me.  It works wonders.

I hope these tips help.  I know many of you are younger Mom's, but these tips will help anyone, so you might try them out on those nights when your energy isn't winding down with your mind.

Until next time.

31 Days Writing Challenge - Day 1

I have just dabbled in writing to this point.  I decided I'm going to really try this, so I have joined the 31 Days writing challenge.  I don't have a recent photo of myself, so I'll have to look into getting something to put on my blog.  My focus is going to be Grandparenting and doing so as a Widow.  I know there are many out there who write blogs for Grandparents, but not many put it into perspective of having lost their wife or husband.  So I'm going to try to share what I can of my everyday life as a Grandmother.  Also to share my faith, and my journey as a widow.

Until Next Time.

A Grandmother's Poem

Grandma Doesn't Care by Judith Bond

I got some jam on her new couch,

But Grandma doesn't care.

I lost my toothbrush, dropped a glass,

My old jeans have a tear,

I tipped the cat dish on the floor,

My feet are always bare,

The way I look is a disgrace,

But Grandma doesn't care.

She's very busy, then she sees

The tangles in my hair

She gets the brush, I make a fuss,

But Grandma doesn't care.

When I am grown, and on my own,

When visits become rare,

I won't forget the love I'd get

When Grandma didn't care.

Monday is Wash Day

Somewhere way in the past, some woman decided that her work had to be ordered to get things accomplished.  And some woman decided Monday would always be wash day.  It spread, as so many things do, and for a long time, it was tradition.  I still do my wash on Monday.  Although I don't have to worry about ironing, which used to take up Tuesday and sometimes much of Wednesday, now I only wash on Monday.  If I have a small load I will do it on Friday also to get things caught up.

Tuesday has become my errands day.  It's the day I get out and run around town paying bills, getting groceries, etc.  I try to buy most of my groceries once a week, and only go back for small things in between.

So tomorrow morning, after coffee, because I can't do anything before, I will get busy and divide my clothes and wash.  I clean house in between loads, things like dust, run the sweeper, straighten the living room and bedroom.  

What is your schedule for Monday?   I would like to know.

Until next time.